AN UNFORTUNATE TALE OF GLUTEN
Isn't it funny how one inconveniently timed glutenous pizza mishap can cause an unfortunate ripple effect of turmoil throughout your life? I'm just saying, this story I'm about to tell you if honestly one of the most annoying things that has happened to me recently. Usually things that irritate me roll off my back within a matter of minutes (or hours depending) and then I forget about them, never to be rehashed. This stupid event, not to dwell on it, but has really put a damper on my week!
I had an awesome Easter with my family. Like, really really awesome. There was a gluten free pancake situation, my dogs behaved, and I got to see my mom for the first time in forever. We ended up going to one of my absolute favorite restaurants that has gluten free options for dinner. I will not name this place, for reasons you will realize later. Now, this server definitely knew that I was gluten free because it only took about three times of him asking me what I was ordering and me reminding him I didn't know because I needed the gluten free menu please. This doesn't bother me though. I've worked at a restaurant. I know shit gets busy. And I know me and my inability to eat gluten are a pain in the ass. I used to care about being an annoyance but you know what, that server can go home and have a beer and a toaster strudel and a big bowl of EZ Mac. All things of which I never will have the pleasure of enjoying again. So we're even?
Anyway, I order my GF flatbread and I am beyond PUMPED. The reason I love this place to much is because they have GF flatbreads that are so similar to regular pizza crust it is delicious (and mildly frightening). A food runner from the kitchen brought out my pizza and said "gluten free? Is this you?". Yes, yes that is me and I am starving since I haven't eaten since the carb filled gluten free pancake situation I mentioned earlier. So I am so ready to devour this thing but I still stop to confirm.... "This is the gluten free, right?". I get a straight up yes.
About three flatbread slices in, our server comes out with yet another pizza. Mind you, we only ordered one. "What is that?" I ask, excited that my dreams are coming true and I am in fact, getting TWO of these delicious pizzas. He responds with, "This is the gluten free flatbread."
Well sir, someone is mistaken here and this guy quickly realized that shit was about to get really real for him. "Hmmm I think I made a mistake. Stop eating." He said with a very startled face. At this point he went back to check with the kitchen and I wasn't alarmed yet because I was pretty certain that pizza I was devouring was the GF one. I've become a serious pro at identifying the reals from the phonies. Obviously my skills aren't as developed as I had hoped because our server came back with some very grave news. I had been eating the glutenous pizza.
I do a mini freak out but I didn't eat THAT much. How bad can it be? I honestly can't remember the last time I had a regular piece of pizza, or a bagel or piece of bread or donut or anything like that. So this was going to be uncharted territory for me. I know that if I accidentally eat gluten in something it definitely causes a seriously unpleasant reaction but in the past couple of years that I haven't had gluten there has never been a time that I ate THAT much.
Game over for me. After Sunday night and Monday spent in intense pain, I woke up Tuesday legitimately thinking I was going to end up in the hospital. I absolutely hate going to the hospital because they never know what to do and I end up being admitted for a week for no real reason it seems. I called into my doctor's office and he gave me a call later that day which pretty much reiterated the unfortunate timing of this event. I am only two loading doses into my Remicade and my Cimzia is out of my system which mean that I am not "fully covered" but any medicine. Basically what I got from that is anything that went wrong in that fragile period of time could cause some BIG problems.
So here we are $157 of steroids later. Also add a liquid diet, lots of Pepto, and probiotics on probiotics. I finally started to feel better towards the end of the week. By this weekend I was finally feeling decent but still a week later I am not back to normal!
I'm not sharing this post because I'm trying to be snotty about the whole dietary restriction thing. That is the last thing that I want from this. What I want is for people to realize that, yes I don't have Celiac and my dietary restrictions to impact me in the same way it does someone suffering from Celiac but that doesn't make it any less serious. I read a ton of articles of people freaking out saying that gluten intolerance isn't real and it only really means something if you have Celiac. This really irritates me because it doesn't matter who has what and who can eat this and can't eat that. It matters that if someone chooses not to eat something whether it be gluten, dairy, meat, soy, whatever, they deserve to have that choice be respected. It shouldn't matter whether you have Celiac, Crohn's, UC, or just choose that those things don't serve your body properly. No one knows your own unique medical situation besides you so be an advocate for your own health, choose what you must do for yourself, and ignore anyone who has something negative to say.
Excuse the rant. But I know there are those out there who either feel the same or who could benefit from reading this and taking on a new perspective from the other side.
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Mental health advocate.
Sharing my raw and real journey through motherhood and navigating Crohn’s Disease. CrohnicallyBlonde is a place where I serve up my unfiltered commentary on chronic illness, mental health, pregnancy, and motherhood alongside lighter lifestyle content like beauty product reviews, travel tips, and book recommendations. My hope is that by authentically sharing my story I can help others going through similar situations not feel so alone and maybe even laugh along with me.
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