Juggling a toddler and a newborn this holiday season has left me less time for gift guide curating this year. For most people on my list I’ll be relying on the other creators who have researched and put together thorough lineups. There is a category which I currently do feel like I am an expert in so I wanted to share a niche, but helpful guide that hits home for me right now.

Practical (+ Thoughtful) Gifts For New Moms 

Of course I’ve shared some tried and true favorites which are always good to give to new moms - things like a cozy Barefoot Dreams cardigan, Ugg slippers, or a breastfeeding safe ingredient face mask. This list, though, I put together as I am in the trenches of postpartum. Literally I put this together in the middle of the night while pumping. Here are five things that are not run of the mill new mom gifts, but gifts that are things she truly wants/needs and may not even know it. 

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1. Baby Book Journal - Baby books are such a sweet concept, but as a busy mom it’s hard to remember to even respond to an email much less keep up with a baby book. I love this one because it only requires one hour of commitment per year. The prompts are created for you and the layout/design is super chic. Gifting this is something a new mom will appreciate. It’s thoughtful, useful, and not stressful to keep up with. There are a bunch of options out there, but this is one I like!

2. Mini Fridge - This is a game changer if you are combo feeding, exclusively pumping, or formula feeding. Having a convenient spot to stash milk supplies next to your bed makes a huge difference during those middle of the night feedings. She could also use it at her feeding/pumping station, keeping it full of drinks and snacks to keep her fueled up. Once baby is old enough, she can switch it to a skincare fridge for things like face masks and under eye creams. Convenience and a little bit of luxury. 

3. Heated Neck Stretcher - The postpartum back and neck pain is NO JOKE. Carrying a baby and delivering a baby are tough on your body, not to mention breastfeeding (where we’re often hunched over or tense). Show a new mom you’re thinking of her with a device that will help ease some of that tension. It will be very appreciated. 

4. Audible Subscription - Listening to audiobooks is a great way to keep entertained during those sleepless nights or have something to focus on during the long (sometimes lonely) postpartum days. When adult human connection is in short supply sometimes putting on a good book to listen to throughout the days makes me feel better. The best part about audiobooks is they are perfect for multitasking with the baby. You can listen during feeds, neighborhood walks, or drives. 

5. DoorDash or UberEats Giftcard - I can’t tell you how many times I’ve wished I could justify getting coffee delivered to my doorstep at 7am. Also, I can’t even begin to count the nights when ordering takeout is the only way we have a chance at getting fed. Meal delivery gift cards are practical, will most certainly be used, and definitely appreciated. Anything that can justify a 7am coffee delivery for a new mom is a win. 

The Amazon Prime Early Access Sale is here! It's a great time to grab some fashion finds for a fraction of their regular price and get them delivered almost immediately to your door. Throughout my pregnancy I have been building my bump friendly wardrobe with some essentials from Amazon that I can also wear in post bump life. I've stuck to a very neutral color palette so almost all of these pieces can be mixed and matched to create a chic (and comfy) look.

You can shop my favorites below and check out full looks via my LTK. 

​Okay, it’s time to talk about potty training. I’ve had so many conversations with other moms about this and I feel like this is a universal rough spot of parenting. 

I don’t really have a specific parenting style. I read books and articles, listen to podcasts, and like all of those infographics on Instagram. I feel informed in many areas, but don’t subscribe to a specific method or style. We take what works and discard the rest (or save it for later depending on the advice). This works for us, but sometimes I think it perpetuates the feeling that I’m always making a wrong decision. So many of these methods and styles contradict each other and since I pick and choose what I use I am never following a plan to a T. I’m never getting to check the boxes on everything. All of this means that by someone’s standards I’m always doing something “wrong”. I get now that’s kind of just par for the course in motherhood. 

Well potty training was going to be different for us. 

Our day one potty training experience sucked. Like obviously, yeah running your kid back and forth to the potty is a lot, and cleaning up pee from every floor in your home is rough, but it’s more than that. 

We decided to start training early (a little before 23 months), because there is a local preschool program that we think Maddox will love. You can start once you turn two and you are potty trained. Everyone we mentioned this to was like “wow two is early”, but we read the books, took notes, and had a plan. He could stay my little baby in diapers for another year and I’d be fine with it, but thinking about the fun I know he will have at this program motivated me. 

Well fast forward to day one of getting our plan in motion. We did everything the book said, and we were proud of how well we abided by the plan. Maddox was doing a great job sitting on the potty, but was really struggling with knowing when it was time to get to the potty. We had a day mixed with success and accidents. We stayed super positive through it. By the end of the day though, Maddox started getting so frustrated with himself. He’s smart and knows he’s supposed to be doing something, but he was really struggling to do it. He’s a natural problem solver so I knew he was really trying. It broke my heart. He patiently waited on the potty, allowed us to help him, and listened to our directions. He was exhausted and upset. We were exhausted and upset. Not because of accidents or mess but because seeing our little boy so frustrated with himself was horrible.

In every potty training and behavior book I’ve read about toddlers there is a focus on the independence you are giving your child by helping them learn things for themselves. You’re helping instill confidence in them and giving them the boundaries to explore and succeed safely. I definitely buy into this and we’ve seen it work with so many other milestones. It’s how our family functions each day. 

Looking at this day through that lens made me question what we were doing. We were giving Maddox the boundaries, the rules, the tools, the encouragement. The effort was there fully from us and him, but this was not giving him confidence even when he was getting it “right”. Things just didn’t feel right. We were off the rails and fumbling our way through. 

I was reluctant to stray from our plan because even the books say you’re “weak” or letting your child manipulate you. I was failing by not making this happen for him. Was I failing him? Or did I feel like I was failing myself? I’m not a quitter I thought. But I also want what is best for my son. If he’s not ready then why can’t we reevaluate? Reevaluating went against my instinct to always push forward and “complete the mission”, but as a parent, my mom instinct was twisting inside of me saying “you know your child best and you know how/what he responds to best. You know how he works. You may not be a parenting or toddler behavioral expert but you are the expert on Maddox.” 

As he took a nap I obsessed over fearing I was letting him down by “giving up” on our plan, but then also fearing that I wasn’t doing what’s best for him as his mom who knows him best. Either way I felt like I was making a wrong decision (which honestly motherhood feels like this a lot). 

Matt and I sat down at the end of the day and agreed on a pivoted plan that felt best for our son based on what we, his parents, the “Maddox experts” think. The weight felt lifted off of my shoulders and the knot inside my stomach loosened. That should be proof enough we made the “right” decision. 

Well fast forward to once everyone is in bed and I’m still thinking about our choice. This has become an entire emotional mind fuck for me. Am I weak and letting my family down because I can’t follow “the plan”. Am I not dedicated enough? Am I not wanting to deal with the challenge? Somehow my entire worthiness as a mom and a person is hinged on this stupid potty training decision. Why. 

I broke it down and by pivoting to a custom Maddox plan as we call it there really are no downsides for him. He will eventually be potty trained, when he is developmentally ready. He may not be able to start preschool right away, but he can start when he’s ready. There are plenty of other ways he can socialize, it doesn’t have to be an all or nothing situation. All is good. 

All of the negatives are based on me feeling like I failed him, me feeling like weak, and me feeling like I didn’t do things “right”. Logically I know this sounds crazy, but once you read enough parenting advice that literally threatens you not to divert from the plan and you’re a type A personality it really can take hold of you. 

How could I have predicted that the most traumatic part of potty training would not be accidents all over our new house, but instead the emotional weight of trying to do what’s best for your child, while also trying to figure out what the heck that is. 

I guess the moral of the story here is a few things:

You know your kid best, you may not be a parenting expert but you’re an expert at being their parent 

Plans, books, and advice for parents read very black and white. On paper it is nice and neat and makes perfect sense. In practice though our kids are all of the messy but beautiful colors in between so we have to figure out how to navigate that. A black and white plan isn’t always the answer. 

Parenting really throws your biggest insecurities in your face and makes you face them head on. As you child grows you are growing emotionally too. 

So a month out from our original potty training weekend, we are continuing to practice our “Maddox plan”. He is wearing training diapers and practicing going to the potty. He is a lot happier, we are a lot happier, and we will get this potty training thing down fully when it’s the right time for our family. 

Back in May we shared the news that we are adding a new little one to the Pickens family! I really wanted to do a cute shoot to announce the pregnancy, but also focus on Maddox becoming a big brother. To us that was part of what made the news so exciting! We had an adorable "Big Bro" jacket made for him, thanks to Amy Scripts. After we say how cute it was we decided to fully embrace the denim thing as a family. 

We worked with my friend Jade (Jade Nikkole Photography) to bring the vision to life. We opted for lots of candids (a must when shooting with a toddler!) and wanted to highlight the genuine happiness as we told Maddox what it was going to be like to be a big brother. 

I shared a few of these precious photos in our social media announcements, but wanted to give them a moment here too since they are so special to us. 

I have been a Pete Davidson fan for forever. The reasons I started to really love him are that he has Crohn’s Disease (so do I) and that he is so open about mental health. These two things are so close to my heart. 

A few years ago during his Ariana Grande days, people were making fun of him for having “butthole eyes”. Grande fired back on Twitter explaining that Davidson has an autoimmune disease and one of the symptoms is having sunken eyes due to dehydration. Later in an interview with Tan France, Davidson replied to the comments by sharing that he has Crohn’s Disease. Crohn’s Disease is an autoimmune condition that causes chronic inflammation throughout the digestive tract. Symptoms include chronic diarrhea, vomiting, pain, and fatigue among many other ailments ranging from mild to severe. While it is commonly regarded as an invisible illness, there are visible manifestations that sometimes occur. There is currently no known cure. There are very few public figures who have openly shared their diagnosis of and experiences surrounding their Crohn’s Disease. Pete’s admission is one of the first times I had heard Crohn’s Disease talked about publicly since my diagnosis in 2015. Obviously the reactions to Pete’s revelation were not favorable and only fueled the already present stigma of Crohn’s Disease. Pete was at the end of an insulting and downright rude joke. 

Now, fast forward a few years to today. Davidson is a successful person in his own right and his fame has been inflated even more with his recent relationship with Kim Kardashian. This man who openly shares his struggles and has a disease that is often taboo or considered “gross” is not only super successful with his own accomplishments, he is also dating one of the most successful, influential, and beautiful women in the world. 

In the recent episode of “The Kardashians” on Hulu, Kim gushed about Pete and how she is having some of the best moments of her life with him. Now that Pete is majorly in the spotlight, I haven’t heard anyone mention Pete’s Crohn’s Disease (and certainly no “butthole eyes” comments). This shift in public commentary is a welcome one I’m sure, as no one wants to be defined or ridiculed by their illness. With Pete’s ever rising fame and influence, I do wonder if Pete and/or Kim speaking out now could help change the stigma around Crohn’s Disease and invisible and chronic illnesses in general. 

Pete has already done so much for changing the stigma around mental health through his openness about his own struggles. Mental health with men is a hugely under discussed issue and he sheds light on it in a humorous and approachable way. Kim is no stranger to mental health struggles either. Her ex-husband, Kanye West, has publicly suffered from his own mental health issues over the years. Kim has been an important part of the mental health conversation acting as a supportive partner and addressing how she’s handled this with her family.  

Together Pete and Kim are a powerhouse of influence who have already made an impact in the area of mental health. They have the opportunity now to shift the stigma not only around chronic illness, but also being a partner to someone with a chronic illness. Of course, this is all extremely personal so if Pete chooses not to ever speak about his Crohn’s Disease publicly again, I respect that completely. I just want to put it out into the universe that if he does feel comfortable sharing his experience, I know there are many of us who would welcome it with great appreciation. 

As a Pete fan (and a Kim fan), I have to close the article saying that I love that they have found such happiness together and I send them the best wishes. I can’t wait to see what this powerhouse couple does, whether it’s being blissfully in love away from the spotlight or sharing more about their experience together. 

Every year I use the Nordstrom sale to grab a few pieces that will be staples in my wardrobe that Fall/Winter. These are my choices this year. Versatile + easy to mix and match. Also all are bump friendly so I don’t have to wait until after baby gets here to wear them.

I also use the Nordstrom sale to stock up on my cozy essentials. A new Barefoot Dreams cardigan and these short sleeve pajamas are on my list every year. This year I added another cute set, a pair of leggings I’ve heard great things about, and Ugg slippers.

The Nordstrom sale is also a great time to stock up on gifts. Here are a few ideas that are sure to be crowd pleasers. All are under $75 and are perfect for a variety of occasions.

If you are scrambling for a last minute Mother's Day gift idea I've got you covered. Whether it is for a mom in your life who you appreciate or you are looking to treat yourself this year, here are 12 options that you can't go wrong with. The best part? You still have time to order!

Click through the shoppable guide below for direct links for each product.

This time last year I was in my third trimester, feeling pretty sick everyday, and trapped in my house thanks to the pandemic. When I tell you the Nordstrom Anniversary Sale kept me going there for a few long nights when I was too uncomfortable to sleep. I planned out a whole ‘Wish List’ of things I was going to need for delivery/new mom life. I was thrilled when I was able to find just about everything I wanted in stock, but of course there was the question of whether or not I would actually use this stuff. There is always that expectation versus reality thing that gets you, especially when entering parenthood. 

A year later I can say that all of my top picks from the sale last year have actually been some of my most used/worn items throughout the end of my pregnancy and first year of motherhood. Honestly, a lot of these picks I couldn’t justify getting if I didn’t snag them on sale so I want to share them with you all so you can add them to your ‘Wish List’ as the Anniversary Sale kicks off. 

​I will never not recommend this blanket. It is the softest, coziest blanket and worth every bit of hype surrounding it. This is probably one of the most used items in my life. I brought one to the hospital with me when I had Maddox and we snuggle in it everyday. They are also super easy to wash and care for which is a must when dealing with baby mess. 

​I have two pairs of these pajamas and they are a staple in my closet. Their buttery soft fabric has me looking forward to changing into them at the end of the day and honestly, I spent many consecutive days right after Maddox’s arrival in these. The button down style makes the top breastfeeding friendly and the bottoms are super stretchy so they accommodate for that postpartum diaper look or c-section recovery. 

​These Barefoot Dream cardigans are worth the price. They are basically like wearing a super cozy blanket. I pretty much lived in these all Fall and Winter. I paired them with nursing tanks and leggings and was ready for lounging on the couch, feeding the baby, or a Zoom meeting. 

​After having Maddox I needed some good walking shoes because as a new mom you walk a lot. Something I learned the hard way is that you also need treads/a good grip. These are perfect for strolling through the neighborhood and eventually chasing you little one around. I have the plain white and grey ones, but can’t wait to get my hands on this pattern this year. 

​Hospital slippers are so necessary and you want a pair that is both comfy and soft effective (in case they get yucky). These check both of those boxes and would be at the top of my list if I was expecting again. 

I lived (and still do live) in leggings so having a few quality ones to rotate through its a necessity. These Zella leggings are a great price, are high waisted, and have pockets. They are on my ‘Wish List’ this year!

Scroll through a few more of my picks below to see what I am hoping to add to my cart this year. 

At the beginning of summer we planned a last minute getaway to Williamsburg, VA. We chose the destination for a few reasons. 

• It was close enough for us to drive and, due to Covid, we weren’t comfortable flying yet with Maddox 
• We were going Memorial Day weekend so we wanted to avoid any beach towns that would be insanely crowded
• Outdoor activities and beautiful places to walk around were plentiful

It ended up being the perfect family friendly place to spend our first real getaway as a family. Below I am sharing some of my favorite places we visited and my recommendations from our trip. Keep in mind, Covid restrictions were still in place it this point so we aimed for outdoor activities and outdoor dining when possible! Coming from Baltimore, the drive was around three and a half hours so totally doable with a little one in tow!

​Where to Stay
We stayed at the Historic Powhatan Resort, which was perfect for what we needed. We had a two bedroom condo with a full kitchen. This was ideal for so many reasons. Maddox was still drinking bottles all day so the kitchen made it easy for us to store and clean them. We were also able to keep our own food/drinks/snacks handy. The second bedroom was a game changer since we could have Maddox set up to sleep separate from the main living space and our room. At that point he was going down for bed around 7pm, and we were not going to turn in for the night at that point. Every night we waited to have dinner until he went to bed and ordered something to be delivered. I picked up a mini charcuterie plate and wine downtown so we could have our own happy hour in the room while we waited on our dinner to arrive. We could then freely watch movies and hang out without having to worry about waking up the baby!

The grounds of the resort are beautiful and were great for walking Maddox around. We also had a full deck which overlooked a pond. It was perfect for blowing bubbles and showing Maddox all of the ducks swimming by. 

​Start Here: Merchants Square

The center of the downtown area, this is where you can find some of the best restaurants and local shops along with seasonal events like the farmer’s market. This is where we started all of our days. We strolled around in the morning to grab coffee and sometimes breakfast. I recommend Aromas, which was our favorite. They have to go orders and seating available indoors and outdoors so you have options depending on what your schedule allows. Whether you stop to grab a bite to eat or pop into a shop, the area is beautiful and very stroller friendly so I would recommend this as a must. 

​Don’t Miss

The Cheese Shop: Gourmet food and every type of cheese and meat you could imagine. You can make your own charcuterie board using their assortment of delicacies or buy a spread pre made. This is where I grabbed some appetizers for our in hotel happy hours with Maddox. There is also a wine shop in the basement that has a good selection and very decent prices.

The Farmers Market: Saturday mornings starting at 8am in Merchants Square. It was rainy when we went, but we still had a great time perusing through the stands of local merchants. Some of our favorite finds were a quality gluten free pasta, fresh pressed juice, and fresh tzatsiki dip. 

​Where to Eat:

Berret’s Seafood - Daily rotating specials of fresh, seafood centered meals. Outdoor seating is first come first serve, so we went a little after the lunch rush and has no issues grabbing a table. Their seasonal cocktails were delicious as well!

Blue Talon Bistro - This place is a must for breakfast with mouth watering sweet and savory options. We had to wait a bit for outdoor seating here, but you can put your name in and shop around while you wait. 

Amber Ox Public House - Out of everywhere we tried, this was my favorite! The whole vibe of the place was relaxed, but also very cool. There was ample outdoor seating and we were able to get a table to a weekend brunch. The menu has unique snacks and features a lot of “boards”. I am a huge fan of that concept! They also have full entrees as well if you are looking to get your own meal. All of the food we got was very fresh and tasty so I certainly am planning to head back during our next trip to try their dinner menu. The cocktails were also very fun and they also have some handcrafted mocktails if you want to skip the booze! 

​What to Do:

Visit Sweethaven Lavender Farm

This was my favorite stop of our entire trip! The charming farm is home to lavender fields along with other flower gardens. They also have a barn with a gift shop and area to try some lavender flavored treats. We picked lavender (Maddox sort of helped but mainly ate dirt) and then tried some lavender lemonade and a lavender snow cone. We spent a couple hours just hanging around the grounds. It is a beautiful place to walk around or sit and relax in one of their cute seating areas. There is plenty of space for kids to run around and the whole family to enjoy the beauty of the outdoors. 

If it Rains:

I had to add this in here because we, of course, found ourselves with less than favorable weather for a portion of our getaway. Taking precautions for Covid, we were hesitant to head to any indoor activities with Maddox. We ended up at the outlets, which actually worked out pretty nicely. One of us ran into stores and shopped while the other walked Maddox around under the covered areas. He got to be outside and see new things while we got to score some deals on new clothes (mostly for him, of course). 


Next Time:

On our next visit definitely want to make sure to get to some of the historic sites. We wanted to wait until Maddox is a little older before we get into some of the more historic attractions. 

Overall I would rate this a very successful first family getaway. We didn’t worry much about sightseeing  since we are planning to visit the historic sites when Maddox gets older. We tried to take on the town in as leisurely of a way as possible and this was a great place to do just that. We also spent a decent amount of time just playing around with Maddox at the resort, which is another reason I am so happy we opted for a family friendly spot with more room for us all. 

​Let me know if you end up visiting Williamsburg, VA and check out any of my favorite spots! Feel free to share your top restaurant or activity so I can add it to my list for our next visit!

xx