Being dehydrated has always been a sad and annoying complication of having Crohn’s Disease. Through vomiting and diarrhea you are pretty much always losing valuable fluids that your body needs to function and, when you are feeling under the weather, forcing yourself to drink the high volume of water that your body needs can be hard and honestly downright painful.
I have struggled with this issue for years and it gets even worse when I am working out! I love being active but when I am dehydrated and lethargic it is difficult to get moving. There have been times that when I do get my butt to a workout class I’ve almost passed out because I’ve had Crohn’s issues the night before and my body isn’t refueled/re hydrated enough to handle a workout.
I’ve dabbled in a few re-hydration methods and finally found something I can proudly advocate for. DripDrop is an oral re-hydration solution that is so easy to use and I can carry it in my purse at all times. Its a powder that comes in little packets (for either 8oz or 16oz servings). You just add the powder into your water and, boom, you have an electrolyte drink. Now I know when you hear electrolyte drink you are thinking about some nasty, sugary sports drink but this is NOT the case. It tastes great (my current favorite is the berry flavor) but isn’t loaded with added sugars. This is also ideal for people with sensitive stomachs because you know those sugars are not our friends. Basically this stuff re-hydrates your body super quickly by only have to drink 8-16oz of water instead of two to three times that amount.
You know I am skeptical about products and especially ones that claim to help with Crohn’s related issues but let me tell you I’ve tried this stuff and I am an actual fan. It works quicker than any other re-hydration drink I’ve tried and doesn’t upset my stomach. I also really love that it has 110% of your daily recommended Vitamin C because, let’s be real, when you have Crohn’s your immune system sucks so we need all of the Vitamin C we can get.
I love the idea of this being such an easy thing to add into your daily routine. Like you can throw it in your purse… there is no excuse why you can’t use DripDrop. It is already on my packing list for my two upcoming trips because flying gets me super dehydrated which then leaves me landing in my final destination with a killer headache and skin that looks like the Sahara desert.
While I started loving this product because of the benefits for my Crohn’s related issues, I since, have been loving the other benefits as well. Staying hydrated can give you some gorgeous glowing skin… something I rarely have had despite my skincare product obsession, now to be changed by my new found hydration routine. I’ll keep you posted on this one…
Last thing, you all also know I love to have a glass or two of rosé from time to time. I am not 21 anymore so after about two glasses I feel my skin drying up like a sad prune and my insides reminding me of how horrendous they will feel the next day. Cue DripDrop because if you drink this before bed on a night of indulging you are number one, super responsible, and number two, will wake up feeling fresh despite the rosé. If you aren’t one for a proactive approach and you’ve already been cursed by a hangover, it is all good. Pop some in your drink in the AM and you are good to go.
I am telling you guys, this stuff is a life saver and whether it is because I am having a Crohn’s flare or because I had one too many spicy margaritas, I am here for it, I am about it, and I recommend it. That being said, in honor of Crohn’s and Colitis Awareness Week, I am doing a special giveaway with DripDrop! The winner will receive two boxes of DripDrop sticks and a super cute DripDrop bag. To enter, head to my Instagram and check out the post of my pink water for details.
What flavor are you excited to try?!
Let’s talk money….
Something that a lot of people don’t realize is the impact that Crohn’s (or really any chronic illness) has on finances. Imagine budgeting each month an extra equivalent of your mortgage payment or car payment just so that you can stay well enough to continue earning that money. Once you get that into your budget you learn how to live and even manage to save money. The budget thing is working. Then imagine taking that extra money you worked your ass off to save for a nice vacation and having to use it all on a new treatment that you need to actually keep yourself alive. Or a surgery. Or a hospital visit. Or if its not that drastic you find yourself slowly dwindling away at your savings account to pay for specialty doctors visit, special supplements, and holistic treatments that insurance doesn’t cover. Thats the reality of finances when you have Crohn’s.
I am by no means writing this to complain about money or finances. I know that I am beyond blessed to have a job that I am well enough to work at, a side hustle for extra cash, a husband who also works his butt off, and a family that would help out if I needed it. I am here to shed light on the reality of what having a chronic illness can do to your financial situation. If an affluent, college educated, 20 something with a well paying job she is well enough to work at faces these issues, think about the people who are less fortunate facing the same thing…. It makes me feel lucky to be in the position I am in with the support I have but breaks my heart knowing that there are others out there who are literally spending their last penny just to stay alive.
If you don’t suffer from Crohn’s or a chronic illness you are probably naive to the things one must budget for. A lot of people just think, oh yeah more doctors visits that sucks. It is way more than just that (I mean that is part of it but we’re here to talk about the less obvious).
Doctors visits add up. Even if you are just paying a $20 or $30 copay that can really amount to a lot on top of everything else. You also are not just seeing one doctor. You see your gastro for the root cause of the issues but often times you are also seeing other specialists for the other autoimmune diseases you have developed or to help remedy the side effects from the medication you have to be on. Add in some urgent care visits because you have a weakened immune system and are sick every couple of months at least. Oh, and add in some visits to your therapist/psychiatrist because being sick all the time can cause anxiety and depression.
Next up, medication. Some things are covered fully by insurance which is great but other medications you have to fight to get covered and can still end up being $200-$300 per month. Once you add in infusions that is a whole other story/insurance situation that can be equally as expensive if not more.
Then there are supplements and vitamins. Those things ARE NOT CHEAP. My doctor, love him, but he recommends a probiotic that is literally $200 a month. I. CAN’T. No, but I LITERALLY CAN’T. Then there are all of the vitamins you are deficient on that you have to buy over the counter that add up. Fun fact, if you are so deficient in something that you have to get a super high prescribed dose insurance actually covers it! #unfortunatelifehack
Holistic treatments and alternative medicine are a whole other ball game that most insurances won’t touch so you are paying out of pocket for things like acupuncture or medical cannabis. Not cheap, extremely helpful, potentially not sustainable due to cost.
Dental care is another area where people often are naive to the correlation. Ever since my Crohn’s started escalating my previously perfect teeth all of a sudden were wearing down due to excessive acid reflux. I had cavities that popped up apparently the root cause was also the Crohn’s. I ended up spending an absurd amount of money on a retainer/night guard situation that is supposed to help protect my teeth and prevent future damage. The jury is still out on the ROI of that one…..
The list continues on…. food for special diets, multiple sizes of clothes due to weight gain/loss and bloating, factoring in days off of work if you are paid hourly, unexpected medical procedures, etc.
As I mentioned before, I just want to raise awareness around this impact of Crohn’s/chronic illnesses. I talk about a lot of things very publicly and finances aren’t usually one of them. I don’t think anyone wants to run around shouting from the rooftops that they have just shelled out an exorbitant amount of money on their Crohn’s treatment. This really just scratches the surface of the financial depth of chronic illness. There are so many other factors that stem from the extra financial burden and, for me, most of it is around the guilt I feel. When Matt and I were dating and I was in the beginning of my treatment there were times when he had to pay my medical bills for me. I didn’t ask, he offered, but it still pained me. As a ruthlessly independent person I literally felt (even more) sick to my stomach thinking about him doing that. I was in my early 20s, just started a new job, and had no money in the bank. I am lucky that I have him. Now that I am in a good place career wise my pride has kept me working relentlessly to bring in as much money as possible for our family so that we don’t have to make sacrifices because of MY health. I don’t want to be the reason we can’t go on a family vacation or the reason why we have to empty our savings to pay a doctor.
While the cost of Crohn’s is high I’ve found that sometimes it isn’t even the money that hurts, it is the guilt, fear, and anxiety that go along with the financial burden that really are taxing.
This year marks our second holiday season in our house! Last year was a whirlwind with our wedding ceremony and planning for our big celebration for the summer. We were super busy and in major budget mode so Christmas festivities and decorating were pushed by the wayside while we hustled through life. This year things have slowed down so we are trying to enjoy every second of the holiday season and make sure our cozy home is just as festive as we are.
While we are amping up our holiday spirit we are also trying to do so on a budget. As much as I love swooning over the huge trees and the extensive displays of Christmas decor on Pinterest, I have to be realistic. We live in a townhouse which is perfect for us but doesn't boast a ton of additional space for 9ft trees and such. The challenge is decorating for a smaller space while on a budget and also looking cute. The perfect trifecta.
I have some tricks up my sleeve that will help you do all three. Now I'm no Martha Stewart so these recommendations are simple and do not require much DIY work. I know there are a ton of DIY hacks for Christmas decor but I do not have time for that. Just being honest.
First things first. Get yourself a tree! And don't spend a fortune.
I know this will shock some of you all but I have never had a real tree in my entire life, I always go artificial. That is just how I grew up. So if you are looking for the real deal just skip this section.
If you are like me and keep it artificial, check out Target. They always have great deals on trees and they are pretty good quality (they also have a TON of options)! We just got our new tree on Black Friday for 40% off from Target. They are still on sale for 30% off now and they have plenty that are under $150 and even under $100.
My top picks are...
You can use these trees year after year if you opt for a classic option or if you want to go trendy (this blush tree is calling my name) the choices are cost friendly enough that if you want to mix it up next year you can.
When it comes to decorating the tree I know there can be mixed opinions. Some people like their tree to be very cohesive and others want every ornament they've ever owned since birth on the tree. I've settled on a fun middle ground that keeps my OCD in check but still has a fun bit of history and personality.
Since my sister and I were born, every year when we were young, Santa would bring us a special ornament that represented us or that we were just really into that year. As we got older we picked these ornaments out for ourselves. Looking back at our ornament collections now is so fun because you can see how we progressed through the years. While I don't want an entire tree that is all childhood memories they are fun to sprinkle throughout the tree each year and always prompt some funny stories while we are putting them up.
I like to start with a neutral set of ornaments that can serve as a base. I feel like the neutral helps to keep things cohesive and then you can add in fun pops whether they are your childhood picks or something funny that you and your hubby are loving this year. Like these disco balls.
These are the basic ornaments I like from Target. They are only $15 per set so you can stock up. They also come in a ton of different colors so you can pick which neutral or base color you want to go with.
When it comes to decorating the rest of the house I have a similar mentality. When we first moved in I invested in some more neutral items that vibe well no matter what kind of Christmas decor theme we choose. These are things like a classic green garland, gold reindeer figurines, and a big fur wrapped present. To me fur and glitter reindeer are neutrals, to you they may be different but you get what I'm saying. Most of these pieces I got from Hobby Lobby when they were having a 40-50% off sale.
This year I decided to add some pops of color and picked up some accents from Target. I love Bullseye's Playground aka that area at the front of the store that has seasonal items from $1 to $5. To be fair I was oblivious that this was called Bullseye's Playground until my mom told me and it all just clicked. (Thanks mom). The selection online isn't that great so I do recommend checked out the in store options. This year I picked up fun dish towels, a table runner, and glittery snow covered faux succulents, all together under $20. Last year I picked up some towels for our powder room, snowflake wine glasses, and coasters, also all for under $20.
These little pieces are a great way to add some trendier cute decorations to your collection without breaking the bank. If they aren't still trendy or relevant next year, you won't feel bad because you didn't invest a ton in them.
I also love using letter boards (like in my first photo!) for funny holiday quotes. I have a blush pink one and a black and white marble one that I rotate based on the season. They also are cute decor between holidays as well. When in doubt a quote from The Office is always relevant.
Another trick I have for updating your decor each your on a budget is using mini ornaments. You can pick them up for only about $3 per set and you can put them in anything from vases to mason jars. They are a super easy way to add a new pop of color (or glitter) into your look.
An area where I don't mind spending a little more money is in the pillow department. In a smaller space these can be a great way to add festive decor into your home. Each year I fall in love with a new collection of holiday pillows but, let's be real, it doesn't make sense to buy five Christmas pillows that will only be out for about 6 weeks to a month. I hack this by investing in some wintery pillows that can be out all season and then accenting them with one or two Christmas specific pillows!
Here are some of my picks for pillows you can enjoy all winter long.
These are the two Christmas pillows I chose for the year! Matt always complains that I don't add enough color into the house so I'm trying to branch out from my go to's. I love that these are a bright and fun take on Christmas colors and the pom poms/tassels are right up my alley.
Similar to pillow, wreathes aren't cheap! As much as I love a big Christmas wreath, this year I opted for one that definitely has Christmas vibes but is holiday neutral enough to remain on the door all through winter.
This one is also on sale right now which is even better!
My last piece of decor (for now, at least) that I picked up this year is this adorable garland! Our Christmas tree is in our dining room (small space probs) and while we can still see it from our living room it isn't front and center. I'm hanging this garland under our TV to add some more festive vibes to the space we are in most. For only $15 I think it is a steal and it can be repurposed in different areas of the house next year.
Last but not least, the stocking situation. We don't have a fireplace in our home so that means no mantle to hang our stockings. We also are so extra in the dog parent department so we have stockings for them as well. It took me a while to find a cute place that we could display our stockings that didn't make them seem out of place.
Finally I had an epiphany and used command hooks to hang them down our railing. It allows them to be on display and you can decorate the railing with a traditional garland or something different and fun each year. After the holidays are over you can remove the hooks with no damage done! If you don't have a railing these obviously also work in other areas of the house so find a cute place where you can create your own stocking display.
Make sure to follow along on Instagram (@crohnicallyblonde) as I continue to share our home as we decorate for the holidays! I hope my tips and tricks were helpful in making your home a cozy and festive place to enjoy with your family this holiday season.
The holiday season is upon us which means you are looking for gifts to give to the special people in your lives. I love consulting gift guides of my favorite bloggers to get some ideas especially when it comes to buying for my sisters and friends. I wanted to kick off my series of gift guides with one that is near and dear to my heart.... a Spoonie Gift Guide!
If you are someone living with a chronic illness you know there are some really special comforts in life that truly are some of the best gifts. There may not be a magic pill you can gift to someone who has a chronic illness that will make it all better, but there are plenty of gifts you can give that can help reduce anxiety, create a more comfortable way to relax, and provide a bit of luxury to a day of self care.
You can shop my picks below so you can treat the spoonie in your life this holiday season (or yourself... alway appropriate to treat yourself). I also have included some brief descriptions, giving you the scoop on why these are the perfect gifts!
1. slip Silk Pillow Case - When you aren't feeling so hot it's no secret that you can spend a lot of time in bed. Having a luxurious pillow case can make you feel at least a bit pampered while you are getting your beauty sleep. The numerous benefits for your skin and hair simply by switching to this pillow case can make you feel like you are treating yourself while you snooze.
2. Herbivore Detox Bath Salts - Baths are won of my favorite ways to unwind after a long day and they help a lot with chronic joint and muscle pain. I also love how cute this jar is because you will actually want it to be displayed in your bathroom.
3. slip Silk Sleep Mask - I never understood the hype around sleep masks until I wanted to sleep in a bright doctors office. Game. Changed. This is a gem to someone who is constantly exhausted.
4. Audible Membership - Audible is the gift that keeps on giving. It allows you to consume content straight through your earbuds in a relaxing way. When you are nauseous or have a migraine the last thing you want to do is read a book or look at a screen. Audible solves all of these problems and is also a great companion for when you are getting infusions or suffering through a long wait at the doctor's office.
5. Pajama Set - Feeling cute and put together goes a long when when it comes to mindset and morale. Even if your hot date this weekend consists of Netlixing by yourself it feels good to get a little fancy in these adorable (but still ultra comfy) pajamas.
6. Earbuds - This goes hand in hand with the Audible Membership. Listening to books, podcasts, or music can be a great distraction during medical procedures or when you just aren't feeling great and need to take your mind somewhere else. Also, great to wear when you don't feel like speaking to any other humans.
7. Mask Frenzy by Peter Thomas Roth - Masks are another great way to practice self care. This set has all of the greatest highs from PTR but isn't necessarily something you can justify spending the money on yourself. This is a special gift that will remind the spoonie in your life to spend a little extra time treating themselves.
8. Gravity Blanket- These are proven to help with anxiety and insomnia which are two things many spoonies experience. Who doesn't want the gift of better sleep?
9. Teddy Bear Faux Fur Bath Robes - Again, sometimes its nice to feel pampered without having to leave your home.
10. Acupressure Mat - These are out of this world when it goes to helping decrease muscle pain and discomfort. They are are proven to help lover anxiety.
Did I miss anything? Let me know what else you would add to the list.
Also, stay tuned for my next gift guide coming soon.
Going into a holiday that is pretty much solely revolved around food can feel like a real nightmare for someone who has IBD. The Thanksgiving table is an uncharted war zone full of things that could potentially set your digestive system into full SOS mode, not to mention the exhaustion of having to actually speak to humans all day, oh and did I mention a limited number of shared bathrooms. Yikes.
My family is always extremely accommodating and supportive of my dietary needs and medical situation which is a relief but even so, I still experience a variety of road blocks throughout Turkey Day. I figured if I am running into these issues, I cannot be alone in my struggle. We are getting it all out here on the table (no pun intended)… all of the annoying things about this food focused holiday. Actually feel free to share this with your family/relatives so they know what you are going through. Never fear though, I will also supply you with some tips on how I get through the day and actually end up having a pretty enjoyable time.
The first issue with Thanksgiving, or really eating at anyone’s house where you did not prepare the food, is how are you supposed to know the actual ingredients of what you are eating? Grandma might say that her dish is gluten free until she realizes that whoops there were bread crumbs in there, do those have gluten? and BOOM your whole day goes to shit. Literally. Or there are the other types of people who know what is in their dish but INSIST you try it anyway. Like I get that your corn pudding was pinned 700 times on Pinterest but that STILL does not change the fact that me and corn are not friends. I don’t see you asking the person with a shellfish allergy to “just taste” your crab dip because its “that good”. Just because my reaction doesn’t involved an epi-pen doesn’t mean it doesn’t count. And to be honest, I still may also end up in the hospital. Re: the last time I though quinoa was a good idea.
As I mentioned before, my family is really good about being accommodating with dietary restrictions. Even still, I can’t always predict that the dishes that on paper meet all of my requirements still won’t make me sick. It could be a spice or an oil that I sets me off, or maybe a specific vegetable that I don’t normally eat. Or honestly it could be anything under the sun that my body just decides to hate that day. Either way, you can try as hard as you want to avoid things that will make you sick but at the end of the day there are no guarantees.
At that point you are stuck out of your house, utilizing a common bathroom, and still having to speak to people despite feeling horrible. Not a great situation. Side note here really quick: this is all assuming you are going elsewhere to celebrate Thanksgiving. If you are hosting it at your house, damn girl, good for you. I can barely figure out how to make my Sunbasket deliveries so I am not with you there but like I said, good for you. So back to the situation where you are sick and have one bathroom and have to talk to people. Sneaking away for a 20 minute bathroom break can be a good excuse to get some downtime from the fam but I also would rather spend that hiatus hiding in a closet somewhere, strolling around the backyard, or literally anywhere but one of the common bathrooms.
Even if you make it through the day without any digestive melt downs it can just be a really exhausting day. Between prepping food, catching up with family, and having little to no time for yourself, it can take a toll on you even if you love being around your family and are having a great time. Over exerting yourself around the holidays can be hard to avoid because you are just really so excited to spend time with your loved ones and celebrate.
So now you’re reading this, nodding your head, and wishing someone had a magic pill to make your Thanksgiving digestive drama go away. Well I don’t have that (because TBH science isn’t my strong suit) but I do have some suggestions based on what I incorporate into my own life and a whole lot of research (aka years of trial and error).
I try and set aside “downtime” every holiday… including Thanksgiving. I usually do this by creating a tradition out of it. No one messes with traditions. For example, on Thanksgiving morning instead of jumping right into big groups and festivities I watch the parades with my mom and my sister. This gives us all time to relax and ease into our day. It allows us to spend time with each other but also not be “on” having to really socialize. We are all on the same page with this one. Maybe you make a new tradition for yourself that revolves around being home at 6pm and getting a start on Christmas movie watching. Relaxing, festive, and still fun.
Next up… Bring your own food if you are concerned. To be full disclosure, I’ve heard mixed reviews on this. Some hosts says its super rude to bring your own meal. Some say THANK YOU because they don’t have to deal with your dietary restrictions and risk being the one that sends you into a shit storm. I personally think this is totally fine and you are actually doing your host a favor. As long as you are messaging it properly that you are doing this because you value spending time with everyone so much and want to make sure you are feeling your best to do so, then I think its perfectly appropriate. Bring a nice bottle of wine to share with everyone and one as a host gift and you should be good to go.
In addition to bringing your own meal, or instead of if the thought of rolling into dinner with your own lunchbox is giving you anxiety, at least bring a dish to share that you know you can eat. By doing this you are sharing the love and contributing to the dinner but you are also hedging your bets because you know there is at least one thing YOU made and YOU can eat. This is also a fun opportunity to show your family that your “weird” diet can still yield some really delicious recipes. And hey, if no one else is into your gluten free stuffing, you will get all the leftovers to yourself. Win, win.
Last piece of advice, and actually my favorite, is to make the holiday not about the food. I know this sounds absurd and impossible especially when we are talking about Thanksgiving. It is doable though. Think about what are the other things you can enjoy and celebrate about the holiday. Thanksgiving… you are (most likely) off of work, you are spending time with people you love, you get to wear a cute outfit, this is a perfect excuse to force your significant other to take corny Instagram photos with you… or dress your dogs up in turkey costumes… maybe that is just me. What I am trying to say is there are plenty of things to look forward to about the day that are non food related. Parades, football, getting ready to Black Friday shop, or literally just celebrating you have a day to not be at work. I don’t care what it is but there has to be something that gets you excited that has nothing to do with turkey.
I know all of this is way easier said than done and the holidays can be a tricky time. Try and hang in there, enjoy what you can, and accept when it’s time to tap out early to binge watch Hallmark Christmas movies. There is NOTHING wrong with that.
This week on the podcast my lovely sister, Amanda, joined us to give a different perspective on having early stages of Crohn's and how she managed that through college and now her early adult life. She got very real on topics like dating, talking to your employer about your digestive issues, and trying to teach a room full of five year olds while you're afraid you might shit your pants. GOOD TIMES.
I'm so happy she was willing to share her story. I think her journey to diagnosis and how she is managing her symptoms are so relatable to anyone at that stage of their life/ IBD.
While we do tackle some serious stuff we have plenty of laughs as well. Diane introduces Amanda like she is writing her match.com profile and Diane AND Amanda both admit what kind of uncivilized humans they are taking vitamins on an empty stomach. That's a big "no no" guys.....
I hope you enjoy listening to this one and as always feel free to leave any questions or comments you have for us!
You can follow Amanda on Instagram here + here.
If you followed my blog/social media before Crohnically Blonde became what it is today, you know that fashion was a large portion of the content I shared (before I even knew “content” was a thing). I have always loved fashion – cue the years of me curating a huge book of magazine clipping inspiration in high school. In college I had a brief stint in fashion school in NYC which was my teenage dream and came back home without a degree but with exposure to a new platform to curate my inspiration. Tumblr. This was in 2009 when social media was just really at the very beginning of becoming a thing. A blogger was not yet an accepted job title, and a fashion influencer was not what we know it as today. I started sharing my own personal styling and outfits on my new blog on Tumblr and eventually Wordpress. Fashion has always been something that I have loved as a part of my life. I love putting together looks, I love sharing my inspiration with others, and I actually feel high off of finding a great deal on a designer piece.
When I started Crohnically Blonde I was in not a great place as far as body image or self-esteem. Crohn’s was ripping apart my body (actually pretty literally), I didn’t have control of my weight or how my body looked thanks to the medications I was on, and I honestly was happy to live in my comfiest sweatpants every day. The last thing that crossed my mind was sharing photos of me wearing things for the world to see, drawing attention to this body I had no control over. In the past, I was used to wearing whatever I wanted and not having to forgo trends based on my bloated stomach or weirdly unexplainable weight I was putting on in weird places. Fashion, as much as I loved it, was also the least of my worries at the time.
As an outsider looking in you probably would have no idea that I have struggled so much with this over the past three years. I come to work in my cute LOFT shirts and stretchy Old Navy pants that my friend so sweetly calls my “mom pants” and there is NOTHING WRONG WITH THAT. I have figured out a “uniform” that makes me feel comfortable in my own skin for the most part which is what I wear out to social events. I stopped experimenting with styles and just sticking to safe because that is the way I would feel comfortable and draw the least attention.
This really doesn’t seem like that big of a deal, I know. But to me it really was because I was missing out on something that used to be such a big passion for me. I had come to terms with the fact that I was never going to have my pre Crohn’s body back and I should appreciate that this is what I had to work with. I should appreciate how much my body does to fight and keep it going instead of shaming it for looking “weird” here and there. The thing is, I had PERSONALLY come to terms with this but then I spent hours scrolling through Instagram comparing myself to every girl to post and outfit photo and sending myself into a panic that I could NEVER put myself in THIS body out there like that.
I know, again, to some people this may seem ridiculous. To me it is not. At this point I’m in eating disorder recovery and dealing with a body that does its own thing health wise so I am on every level feeling absolutely out of control. At the same time as much as I hate myself for not looking like and Instagram model, I hate myself for caring and letting that hold me back. I preach authenticity and am all about owning your body especially through the lifetime struggle of ED recovery. I preach these things, empower others to do them, but yet, I am terrified to post a photo of me in an outfit.
As I’ve grown in my blogging journey and participated in more events and photoshoots I have come to realize that I have to stop letting this hold me back. When you break it down I am literally NOT participating in something I am passionate about and that I love because I am scared of… what? Comparison? Judgement? Both not things that I can’t stand to be the reason I shy away from something I enjoy.
So here we are and I will continue to share with you all. I want you to know that behind that outfit photo there is purpose and meaning for me posting it. Not only am I genuinely excited to, again, share my fashion journey but I am also excited to hopefully show someone else that just because you aren’t meeting your ridiculous standard of perfection you should still go for it, put yourself out there, and don’t let it hold you back. I also hope that you all will take away from what I share that to me fashion is about feeling confident in what you are wearing and learning how to dress for your body in a way that works for you and makes you feel great. I’m sharing the real dirty deets on what I am wearing (stretchy jeans and all) because that is what is real and authentically me. So enjoy and I hope this will inspire you to continue on this never ending journey of finding self-confidence with me.
I'm really, really excited that you will be able to keep up with all of my favorite looks via LIKEtoKNOW.it (here!) or download the app! I have been a huge LTKI fan for years so I am thrilled to finally be able to use the platform to share my personal style and finds.
Photo by Jade Nikkole Photography
I’ve received quite a few messages recently asking for a health update and I realized I haven’t done one in a while so it is far overdue that I share what has been going on.
First and foremost, I have had so many other positive and exciting things happening in life that my attention has been on that and I’ve been in what I like to call “maintenance mode” health wise. Trying to get by day to day without making things worse but also I wouldn’t say really making things better. That is okay by me though! If most days I can function and live life happily I have come a long, long way in the past three years or so. I hate that this might jinx it but overall things have actually been pretty good.
By pretty good I mean by my standards of not in the emergency room and pretty much fully functioning. That doesn’t mean that my symptoms have gone away though and that other symptoms haven’t decided to manifest themselves unfortunately upon me. Those things still happen and are still there and I am going to share them with you. I feel weird sometimes going into detail about this stuff because I don’t want sympathy for what ailments I have. I know there are so many other worse things that I could be experiencing, I assure you I know that and I am so incredibly thankful that I can function the way I do. The reason I share is not to complain but it is to bring awareness. There are so many weird symptoms and problems I have run into over the years that are seemingly unexplainable by doctors and took my reading someone else’s experience to realize I wasn’t crazy. That is why I want to share. Hopefully by me sharing my health journey you can relate and maybe not feel like such a psycho.
So like I said overall my Crohn’s has been relatively under control. I am not in remission yet but slowly working towards it. I still go and get my Remicade every 6-8 weeks. Currently we are on an every 6 week schedule. That seems to be working well but the side effects still make me miserable at times. I do have to say though, when I started Remicade a little over a year and a half ago, I was totally unprepared to cope with the unavoidable side effects but as I’ve become a Remicade pro, I’ve gotten a better handle on managing them. CBD oil is my best friend in that regard. I take a small dose every day to help with pain, inflammation, anxiety, and a whole slew of other things that can be a separate post. But anyway, I amp it up after my infusion and when my side effects are bad. The side effect that is probably the most annoying is the joint pain. I can’t STAND it. I remember I went to geriatric yoga class at the YMCA, I’m not kidding you geriatric like right next to my grandpas retirement community, and I was in tears by the end because my wrists and knees were so swollen and in pain. From the former hot yoga enthusiast this was very abnormal for me. So this still happened but my CBD oil helps and I have a topical CBD cream that I use on my muscles and joints which is a huge relief as well. That is where we are with the Remicade situation.
I unfortunately got the news last time I was at the gastro for my infusion that I was long overdue for my colonoscopy/endoscopy so I had to go through that lovely experience last week. The prep definitely sucks but like the having diarrhea for hours on end isn’t that much of a shock to my body unfortunately so that’s not the part I really hate. It’s the fasting and pain and nausea from drinking that crap and the pain after the procedure. That is what really gets me. I do have to say an anesthesia nap is the best nap and I totally love the nurses at my gastro so they make the whole process a whole lot more enjoyable. I see them more than I see most of my friends and they all know my life story so… yeah. The colonoscopy/endoscopy situation was a success though. I still have inflammation in my ileum so they are upping my Remicade dose and my esophagus has some funky stuff going on but all in all not horrible! To go off on a tangent quickly I am an actual nightmare when I come out of anesthesia. Like actually satan. I’ve been known to cuss out doctors and demand a bedside cocktail just to name a few situations. I actually get very embarrassed because I spend like so much of my life with these people I can’t have them thinking I am the devil. This time I was actually really nice, chatted about dogs and Game of Thrones, requested a gingerale, you know, all normal sleepy people stuff. It takes me so long to get unconfused though and I was on some pain meds on top of it so things were not looking right from my perspective. When my doctor came in to give me my update I somehow thought he was saying I could go off of my medicine so I happily thanked him and said oh yay so I’m done with my medicine? Apparently from what my husband said this was directly after he said “we are going to up your medicine”. They both laughed, I was confused, my husband was embarrassed by me and then I reminded him that he practices the art of selective hearing often so he could CHILL and get off my back please. I actually didn’t remember anything my doctor said and had to get a debrief from Matt who so graciously accompanied me. This man COMPLAINED that he was hungry after it had almost been a full 48 hours since I had had a solid food. That’s like complaining that you have a tummy ache while your wife is in labor. He also made sure to make fun of me for yelling loudly how gassy I was while still waking up from my sedated slumber. Really keeping the love alive.
The real issue I’ve been having recently is with my sinuses. Now you wouldn’t think this would necessarily be impacted by Crohn’s but you know what HERE WE ARE. Your body is one big connected thing so what else can we expect. To give you some backstory I had sinus related surgery when I was 6 and then again about 7 years ago. That was the time I cussed out my doctor and told him I hated him and to get me out of there. During the recovery from that surgery I was also satan and begged my mom and step mom to take me back to the hospital because I was sure I was going to die. It seems dramatic, I know. But if you have had sinus surgery you know it is NO JOKING MATTER. I digress. So I got this surgery to remove my inflamed sinus tissue and then I got a really weird antibiotic resistant bacteria in my sinuses afterwards which was a hoot. I was alright for a few years but just recently it started to get worse again. Usually one of these surgeries is enough for one’s lifetime and I am hoping that will still be the case for me but like let’s be real, with my luck chances are I’ll be cussing out another doctor while coming out of sedation again soon. I won’t bore you with the whole story but basically my doctor wanted me to try a specific antibiotic but wasn’t really sure about it and then the side effects were nuts specifically in the gastrointestinal department so we had to nix that idea. Back to the drawing board, I just got a CT scan to see if the inflammation in my sinuses has returned.
Inflammation seems to just haunt me which is not unusual for Crohn’s sufferers or those suffering with other auto immune diseases as well. It took digging through the internet to find cases where sinus inflammation was linked to IBD and there is proof that it can be hence the whole your body is inflamed 24/7 and all that jazz. But I couldn’t find anything that was really helpful or someone saying here is what I did to make my sinuses better for good. So here I am waiting on the results of my CT scan and feeling like there is a large rhino running repeatedly across my face.
I’ll keep you all updated on what the results come back as. I am pretty certain this is linked to my Crohn’s in some way. Even if not directly, the inflammation piece is something we can’t ignore here. Hopefully I can get to the bottom of this so next time someone is frantically Googling “sinus pain and Crohn’s” maybe this pops up and you won’t feel so crazy.
I know this was a long one but, hey, it has been a while. I love hearing updates from you all too on your health journeys so please, please, please share via comments or if you don’t like putting your whole life out there on the internet like I do, drop me a message on Instagram!
Fall is my favorite season to shop for. Piling on layers means more chances to mix it up with textures, colors, and patterns. I live for a good textured piece -- fur, velvet, leather, suede, fringe. I try and keep my wardrobe pretty monochromatic and use a pop of color and bold textured pieces here and there to liven things up.
I have my tried and true pieces that carry me from year to year but I like to buy some trendier things each year that I can put into my wardrobe rotation but won't break the bank. Over the past six months or so I have been on a mission to curate a list of tried and true websites that can be my "go to's" when I am in need of something fashion related. There are a lot of sketchy sites out there that make it seem like you can get a really good bang for your buck but they can be total scams or the quality is crap. I can go on the record here and say that all of these sites I am recommending I have personally purchased from and am a fan of the quality, customer service, and delivery time.
1. Vici - I learned about this site from The Skinny Confidential Facebook group and from my first order I have been totally obsessed. They have a mixture of classics and trendy pieces that aren't crazy expensive but still good quality. I bought a ton of dresses for our honeymoon from this site and they were so perfect. They are almost always running some type of 20% off sale (sign up for the emails so you can be in the know on these!) and they also have flash sales where you can get great pieces for $20 and their sale section is often around 50% off. The only downside is that all returns have to be credited back to you in the form of store credit so just know that going into it. I haven't had any issues with this because I can always find something else I want.
I am currently obsessing over this pullover. I have some store credit waiting so this one may be next on my list...
2. Fashion Nova - This site is my favorite for buying pants/skirts/any type of bottoms. They have styles that fit and flatter a wide variety of body types which makes their pants selection a lot more versatile than most online retailers I have come across. A lot of they bottoms are stretchy too which you know I love.
The jeans that I basically live in are these ones from Fashion Nova. I have them in black. They are super stretchy and high waisted so they really suck everything in. I also just ordered these leather leggings which I am pumped about.
3. Lulus - Lulus is my go to for dresses for special occasions as well as shoes and accessories. They will run different kinds of promotions on sale items and during those you can score some great stuff for as little as $10. Their shoes are also so cute but you don't have to feel bad about buying something trendy that may be out next season because they are totally affordable. Returns are easy and shipping is quick. Very efficient.
Last season I got these faux fur mules from Lulus and I am totally obsessed with them/ recommend them to every person I meet pretty much. Oh and they're only $27. Worth every penny.
4. Forever 21 - Throughout high school and college Forever 21 was my jam. I fell a bit out of love with it when I realized I was no longer 21. Or 22. Or 23. And definitely on the other side of my 20s. Their clothes didn't really do my grown up body justice anymore and left me frustrated because.... growing up. You feel me? Anyway, once I came to terms with the fact I wasn't going to be rocking body con dresses and mini skirts on the regular I started to appreciate Forever 21 again. It is truly a great place to get inexpensive trendy pieces. While they aren't the best quality, most of the things I am buying here probably will be out by next season anyway so, not a huge deal.
This season I have been loving all of the plaid they are featuring and I have also ordered a few sweaters this year in fun colors and styles. This sweater has been my go to for casual Fridays.
Drop me a message and let me know what your other online shopping recommendations are. I love hearing from other bloggers what their favorite online retailers are because my list is always growing!
Also, let me know what you think of this post. I am trying to share more of my fashion finds and tips so please please please share what you want me to give details about!
This week I have a total badass babe, Julianna Rubino, on the podcast. She is the creator of one of my favorite blogs, Barre to Table, where she shares her workout routines, wellness tips, delicious recipes, and more. Her content always is super informative and she has me updating my grocery "wish list" every time I watch her Instagram stories. She balances working on her blog, teaching barre classes, heading up Baltimore's Electric Flight Crew, oh yeah, and working her day job in sales. Casual.
That being said, not only am I so excited to have you all hear her tips and tricks in regards to fitness and nutrition but she also has an inspiring take on how to balance everything you have going on in your life. She is the epitome of "hustle hard" but she knows how to still make time for herself and her family. #goals.
In this episode we cover some much requested topics, like time management, food recommendations, and her routine, as well as diving into things like how we feel about today's nutrition trends like intermittent fasting and plant based diets. Throughout the episode she drops some gems of advice and knowledge (along with some of her must have's and favorite products) so I can't wait to hear the takeaways you get from this one!
One of my favorite things about the advice Julianna gives is that her tips are so easy to seamlessly integrate in your life. Think, adding a 10 minute HIIT workout in when you first wake up in the morning or swapping ingredients in your favorite dinner with ingredients that will make you feel like your best self. Her recipes are also actually doable... as in not super complicated and don't take you an entire evening to make but impressively taste like it did. Seriously, her sweet potato gnocchi recipe is INSANE and way less complicated than it sounds. Promise.
Keep scrolling to see a round up of some of our favorite articles on Barre to Table and make sure to follow Julianna on Instagram (@barretotable) to get even more of her fitness and food tips. I am so thankful she came on the podcast and shared her wisdom with every one. I can't wait to work together again soon!
What were your favorite takeaways from the episode?!
BEST OF BARRE TO TABLE
FOOD + NUTRITION
Blonde babe. Maryland native. Crohn's crushing puppy mother to two sweet rescues.